Please read Maya's Post first to get a proper idea

A week ago when Maya said that shez coming to Chennai on the way to Pondicherry and she would spare some time to meet me, I was thrilled. It’s a wonderful wonderful feeling to be thought of and it’s nice to think that someone out there wants to meet me. I jumped at the opportunity and by way of preparation cut my toe nails, shaved and had a bath and was ready to meet her a couple of days even before her train arrived at the Central Station in Chennai.

She said that her train would reach at 12 30pm and she would meet me at 3 after lunch. Someone just reaches Chennai and the first thing is that they would want to meet ME of all the folks? I found it a bit hard to believe! At the same time I felt honoured.

Maya says in her blog: Contrary to the plan, Doc called up the previous night to reconfirm that the plan was in place. I did have the mind to clobber him for springing up the surprise of hearing the voices before it was expected. But then I understood his eagerness too.

Maya, to tell you the truth, more than wanting to hear your voice, I wanted to confirm if the plan was in place coz I had cancelled all the appointments and if the meet didn’t take place, I would be frustrated coz I would've lost the opportunity to fleece my patients of a few thousand bucks! And you know how online communities work too right? They have a weird way of appearing enthusiastic online but when it comes to the real all the pizzazz fizzles out and the 'meet' turns out to be a fiasco. Believe me so many beautiful dames in Sulekha wanted to meet me...peeps like the Lovely Sweet Reffy, the Lovely Eye, The Flamboyant Psychedelic, the radiant Opulence, the naughty Obscurity Speaks and a whole bevy of other girls...but when they learnt I was using a Whisper Ultra to treat a leaking abscess, they all held back sending me into a Devadasesque mood. Ok, I digress....Mercifully you weren’t like them....and I also had the bonus/privilege of listening to your lovely voice before I met you....and guess what I thought when I put down the phone? "Hey, here is a Mallu babe who speaks flawless English without any tinge of the Mallu accent whatsoever!"

As fixed, I went in sharp at 3 15 to meet the Lovely Sweet Maya, her gentleman husband and her two wonderfully cute kids. Instantly I took a liking to the family....they were what one calls...'cool'...really cool...Nothing pretentious...just plain simple uncomplicated folks. You can imagine that if the first thing they do on a vacation is to meet a silly blogger from Sulekha!


Maya says: There he was, bespectacled, slim frame, shorter than me with a smile on his face. He was wearing a black shirt and I was thanking god that it was nothing like what I saw in his blog… the floral printed ones!

Bespectacled, Yes! Slim frame? Well, I am 75 kgs...and for someone who is 173cms tall (without heels) I am overweight by 2-3 kgs! And how tall are you sweetheart? And when did you come to the conclusion that I was shorter than you? We didn’t even stand next to each other and measure ourselves up! And what if you are taller than me? It actually makes a lot of things easy if the lady is taller...err...err...for e.g....she can reach the loft without having to use a stool to climb...

And the confusion that I was in as to what clothes I would wear to meet her was terrible! It was like how the NASA folks go through...whether to launch the satellite now, or 4 hrs later or postpone it by 2 days. Formal shit is out the question...too casual tight shirts and jeans would seem disrespectful for a 1st time meet...going out in my birthday suit would amount to streaking and I would be booked for being a public nuisance....and then I did what every sane man would do...I asked my wife...and she came up with the choice of clothes. So there I was in a Black Pepe party wear shirt and striped trousers from DKNY.

Before meeting her...I was joking that I would laff and laff and laff silly when I saw her....coz of that bikini thing in one of her posts...but then that evaporates when you see an elegant lady...with two sprightly kids and a husband in tow right? I was half expecting to see a grim and gruff Mallu lady in her mid 30's clad in their traditional sari but then when I saw her I was kinda amazed....she looks very petite...pretty actually damn pretty and chic…carries herself with élan and is very very friendly...shez the kinda girl with whom you can hang out at the coffee shop for hours together and never feel bored. I had bought some chocolates for the kids but little did I know that I was committing a grave and heinous sin when I didn’t buy one for the mother too! She is as kiddish about chocolates as much as her 4 yr old is! Well which sane woman wouldn’t?!

We drove over to the Oxford Bookstore...a neat place for casual talk over books and tea/coffee. The kids were sent off to look for books they like so that the adults could do some talking....but I took an instant liking to her daughter....not that I didn’t like her son...but you know how daddies-to-be like dotters very much...but the kids came back ever so often and pestered their mother to come along with them to show her the things they found fascinating. As I see the thing...it means that shez inculcated a lot of manners in her kids....at least they didn’t bring a whole load of things with them and clamour their parents to buy it for them. It was also good to hear her husband say that the kids are allowed a ration of 30 mins per day for cartoon viewing on the telly. The kids can choose their timings...if they finish the 30 min quota in the morning, then they have to do other things in the evening...how nice....I always thought today's kids were spoilt no end by their parents who switched on something stupid on the telly so that they, the adults, can be left in peace to do whatever shit they do!

Her hubbs bubbs is a real gentleman...very soft and mature...smart and handsome to boot! (I know I shouldn’t be saying this being a straight guy myself, but then what has to be said has to be said right?) He looks like the Siamese twin of my school classmate's elder brother...and I gave him the: "You look like exactly like someone I know" thingy. And I eventually popped the question: "What do you think about your wife blogging?". To which he said: "Its ok...she likes to write…so if its going to have an allocated time instead of being 24/7 on the net, its fine with me" By then Maya pitched in too eagerly..."I am on the net only in the evenings when he is watching TV or reading and when the kids are doing their homework and stuff like that" Anyways, its nice to know that there are such good husbands who allow their wives to blog and even meet up with their wife's net pals. We spoke of many things...investments...this...that...everything except blogs and bloggers. And not for a moment did I feel that I was meeting 'strangers'.

And yea, Maya's dotter had a few skin lesions on her face and I didn’t lose out the opportunity to show off my medical talents...so even without them asking me for a prescription, I wrote out one...and since it was an unsolicited prescription...I didn’t ask her for my consulting fee. Maya, please feel free to send me some green backs if you really want to pay. It’s fine by me! I could do with a couple of hundred quids more!

It was time to move after 2 hours of fun and good camaraderie...and before we went our ways, Maya gave me a gift to hand over to my wife...when wifey saw the baby book she was all thrilled...she'd never seen anything like it before...it was an apt one and very thoughtful of the sweet lady to give my wife, an expecting Mom a gift like that. My wife and I thank you very much Maya for that.

Ok, now to explain a few things that Maya had written in her blog:

But he did manage to tip the scales in his favour when he wrote a prescription for my daughter's skin problem
Yea, you were the one who told me that to patao-fy the mom, one has to patao-fy the kids!

At some points Doc took time to unwind but then he eventually looked comfortable.
See, sweetheart, the thing is if you came alone, I'd have gone at you like there were no tomorrow...but with a hubbs bubbs by the side...one has to really watch what one says right? Not that he was a hindrance! He was cool! Kudos to him for that!

Doc wanted to gift me a book but as I could not find anything interesting all of a sudden, it has been kept pending.
I wanted to impress you by buying you something...but then since you don’t read porno stuff I couldn’t buy you anything! You should gimme your postal address so that I can send something across if I came by anything interesting. Apart from porn that is!


And for all that flirtatious, Casanova image he portrays on Suls, he is nowhere near that.
If I'd tried all that stuff on you, I would have come home with one appendage less on my body...I mean...err...err.....your hubbs bubbs would have chopped my...err...nose off if I tried to flirt with his wife!
Besides, if I flirted in real life too....wouldn’t I be labelled a 'slimy sleazeball' ? That wouldn’t be fitting of a man who is 35 and has bald patches of alopecia!

The meet was terrific....and it’s nice to have met a beauty such as Maya. I conclude by borrowing one of her favourite quotes from O.V. Vijayan: Everybody who entered my life has always given me something in return.

Thanks Maya....it was a pleasure meeting you and your warm family. The pleasure is mine. Do keep in touch. Here is a rose for you...




Amen
d_w


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PS: A big thank you to all the wonderful folks who had commented on my previous post:) Sorry that I wasnt in a 'position' to reply to those comments. A few pads later and after a course of antibiotics I am in a much better shape!


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